Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Conversation & Online Etiquette

I have a simple request for everyone, as you surf the web and interact with other users:  don't be a jerk.

On the surface, it seems like a simple request.  We've been raised with this simple lesson, haven't we?

But, alas, when we feel our intelligence is being insulted or challenged, many of us feel we must retaliate.  This is the worst thing we could possibly do.  If someone is trolling, they don't care how much evidence we have to support our case.  If someone repeatedly refutes our evidence by pulling rank ("I've been in this business for 20 years!"), cease and desist.  We can't control how others conduct themselves on the internet or elsewhere, but we can control how we react to it.  I remind myself of this often, but I have made the mistake of engaging when I shouldn't.  It's a human mistake, so I hope the person on the other end of the line knows not to deal with me on a day in which I should not be within 50 miles of a keyboard.

Here is a chart that may help you identify a lost cause.

Sources22 Words and Atheism Resource.

Save yourself some agony and recognize when someone is not willing to change their position in light of solid data.  Recognize when you've entered the realm of opinions and subjectivity.  Though I don't have numbers to prove it, I have a feeling that most people live there.  If you do make a permanent home there, please learn how to approach a dissenting opinion.  Not everyone is going to agree with you in all things.  You don't need to be in eternal agreement in order to have a good conversation.

Since so many people view a dissenting opinion as an automatic attack, my online involvement is limited.  The only online forum for massage therapy that I'll engage is POEM | Project for Open Education in Massage, and I've given up on LinkedIn conversations.  If we can't be decent to each other, it isn't worth the time or effort.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Off-Topic: Cats & Carpets

This morning started much like any other; which it shouldn't, because it's Sunday and I am not a morning person.  Smidget, my older cat, understands this.  There are days I'll get home from work, and I doubt she's even left the bed.  When Nym wakes up, there's no going back.  During the day, you may not pick her up or snuggle her, though she might take a nap on you if you sit still long enough.  In the morning, she's happy to demand your attention and adoration.

This morning dawned at the usual hour.  Instead of a certain kitten pestering for food, she was pawing at the floor, which means she didn't make it to the litterbox.  I was out of bed in a flash.  If you want to discipline the critter effectively, you need to catch them very quickly.  That out of the way, both cats were closed in the bathroom while I dealt with the mess.

That out of the way, I flopped onto the bed next to my husband and bemoaned the ubiquity of wall-to-wall carpet.  Bare floors are just cleaner.  You spill coffee on hardwood or laminate, it's easy to mop up.  Spill it on a rug or runner, mine are thin enough to thoroughly clean (no thick, shaggy material for me, thanks).  Spill on carpet, have fun.  Pet makes a mess on the carpet, best of luck to you.  Growing up in a series of rentals – including one gloriously carpet-less, military-issued apartment – I'm ready for anything.


Real product

After whining about the unfortunate infestation that commonly plagues rentals, I got up to release the beasts and shower myself.  With the last concert of the season at hand, my choir has a busy afternoon ahead of us, and this is the least I can do to assuage some of the problems we'll encounter.  I turned the knob and attempted to push the door open.  A few millimeters' clearance showed me that one of the drawers under the sink was pulled open.  Someone also knocked a couple items off the counter, for added difficulty.

I called for an axe, hammer, and fire.  My husband used the stick end of a cat toy to knock the smaller obstructions out of the way, then bargained for food, coffee, and a trip to True Value.  Seeing as I like all three of those, as well, I accepted.  Fed and caffeinated, we confessed our woes to the guru, and she helped us find the materials we needed for this endeavor.  We didn't need a machete, but I got the next best thing.  Mine came in red.

Relevant to the problem at hand, we bought a flat slab of metal, bent it into a 90° angle, which we slipped under the door to knock the drawer shut.  I can only guess which of the two is the morning's undeserving miscreant, but they were both fed before I attended to myself.

Fortunately, this ordeal did not interfere with any clients.  While I am not a morning person by nature, I understand that there are fully-realized adults whose schedules do not respect the sanctity of early hours.  I do my best to be accommodating, but I'll be moving my standard hours off the weekend in the new year.  Despite two decades in school, I'm beginning to see the value in giving myself a couple days to recharge.  Downtime is especially nice when dealing with unruly kittens.  I take my hat off to parents.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Massage Education & Sunk Cost Fallacy

Sunk Cost Fallacy:  the idea that a company or organization is more likely to continue with a project if they have already invested a lot of money, time, or effort in it, even when continuing is not the best thing to do...

Science has proven that massage therapy cannot increase circulation, spread cancer, cause miscarriages, dehydrate you, or remove toxins.  When last I checked, these myths are still perpetuated in schools and practices.  Why?  Part of the problem is a lack of research literacy, so even with the evidence under one's nose, how do you make sense of the damn thing?  Another problem is that we don't want to admit that we're wrong, especially after investing two year's worth of time and money.

My BA gave me my first real experience with the sunk cost fallacy.  Three-quarters of the way through my studies, I realized, "There's no room for my interests in this economy," but with only a handful of credits standing between me and graduation, I put in the extra year.  Was it worth it?  That depends on what you consider to be a payoff.  I was looking for a career, but today's mantra is, "You're better off having a degree than not."

To be fair, some people understand the situation.

We experience this fallacy under menial circumstances, as well.  This past summer, a few friends and I decided to check out a festival.  A garlic festival, if you've ever heard of such a thing.  Under normal circumstances, the drive would have taken roughly half an hour.  With everyone in the valley heading the same way, it took well over an hour.

Twenty minutes in, a couple of us were nauseated from the congestion and stop-and-go traffic.  Forty minutes in, we wanted to turn around and go home, "But we've already come this far..." so we continued.  The sane thing to do would have been to turn around and go home, but after putting so much time in, we wanted to see a payoff*.

After you put all that time, energy, and especially money into anything, you don't want to turn around and say, "Well, that didn't work.  I think I'll put even more resources into something else, now."  You want to see a point and purpose.  You want some sort of validation for your effort.  Until I found myself elbow-deep in massage studies, I had not seen this desire expressed so strongly.

Rasmussen is a private college of various disciplines, but everyone had to take Human Biology, especially Health Sciences.  The course curriculum was the same for everyone, and for this reason, I'm fairly certain that everyone was required to find out why we don't need to drink 8 glasses of water every day.

As a general rule, just drink when you're thirsty.

Unfortunately, we grew up with this soggy "8 glasses per day" myth.  It stayed with us as we learned how Columbus alone knew that the world is round, brain cells never regenerate, and you'll need to know how to write in cursive for high school, college, your signature...is anyone using cursive?

When we spend so much time believing one thing, it takes a reckoning force to make us see and accept otherwise.  We seem to enjoy bashing Columbus, so most educated people know he did not "discover" the world to be round.  With the advent of computers, many are rejoicing over solid evidence that we actually don't need to use cursive.  I don't know of anything so righteous that debunks the 8 glasses myth.

My massage classes still discussed how very important it is to drink so much water (and it must be water) every day.  We were supposed to be able to assess someone's daily intake by the feel and color of their skin.  We were supposed to encourage clients to drink extra water after a massage to flush toxins, and we discussed the dangers of neglecting to do so.  After two years and tuition, how can anyone expect us to admit that this was all wrong?

FOR SCIENCE!

Well, naturally, but that's another discussion.


*The driver insists it was worth it, because we had to try the garlic ice cream.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Off-Topic - National Adoption Month

In business classes, we're cautioned about mixing personal and professional interests.  We'll inevitably step on someone's toes, at some point, and that's bad for business.  My business is too new for me to say, "I don't care," but here it is:  I don't care.

November is National Adoption Month.  I come from a very blended family.  My paternal uncle is adopted, my grandparents helped raise me and my brother until my father remarried (it takes a village!), said marriage giving us a great step-family, and I can't count the number of "uncles" I had growing up in the military.  The holidays were a blast.

I had the opportunity to share this with a class while attending UW-Green Bay.  The assignment was to present our respective heritage.  I could sum it up with "military & geek culture", but that wouldn't fly.  I went over the usual stuff, proclaiming what a typical American mutt I am, but the two most important factors were my military and step family.  Nobody in either of these camps had any obligation in my upbringing, but they were there, they're part of who I am, and I can't imagine my life any other way.

Following my presentation, a classmate caught up with me after class.  Her boyfriend had two children from a previous relationship, and she wanted to hear more about what it's like being a step-child.  We chatted for a bit, and my answer to her final question sums up the experience for me.
Q:  Do you get along with her?
A:  She's my mom.  We have our ups & downs, but she's my mom.

I could have said, "Oh, yeah!  We're like this!" and done the little finger-linking thing, but that would have fallen short of the truth.  I wouldn't risk providing any false hope or horror, and the military provides a special form of strife to add to the teenage years.  And you know what?  My friends had similar issues with their own families; biological, military, or other.

I don't have the 1950's, white-picket fence, 2.5 (point five...?) children image of what makes a family.  That certainly isn't what my family ever looked like, and I won't tolerate any insult to my mom insisting that "it isn't the same" unless I bear the child myself.  I don't know if I'll have 2 children or 5, but I don't plan on taking 9 months out to make one.  If it happens, my husband and I will be happy, and we'll be especially curious as to what sort of creature our genetics will create, but this isn't a prerequisite for family.  For all we know, our first child might be waiting for us as I type this blog.

Learn about adoption and foster care:
Adopt.org
AdoptUSKids.org
- How to Foster
AmericanAdoptions.com
LittleCity.org/foster
NationalAdoptionDay.org (November 23rd)

Friday, November 1, 2013

LIKE me on Facebook!

Actually, no, don't do that.  You see, I'm not really on Facebook.  I am the Communications Officer for my AMTA-CA Unit, and I have a dummy account to play referee for our unit's page.  After enjoying 5 years of mayhem, I quit Facebook in 2010.  I regret disappearing without giving friends (real friends) much notice, but I don't regret leaving.

Like many others who've made this decision, it gets a little annoying when we see Facebook integration everywhere.  On Google+ (yes, I'm a user; yes, there's plenty to be said about Google integration, as well), I saw that Whole Foods was holding a pet photo contest.  You just needed a picture of your pet in, on, with, or mutilating one of their bags.  Like many pet owners, I knew I had the winning photograph.

I clicked on the link for the rules, and the first thing you have to do is log into Facebook and *Like* them.

"You have an account!  What's the problem?"

A couple of problems.  First of all, I like them in real life.  We can still be friends in real life without Facebook mediating.  Secondly, for all intents and purposes, I'm not on Facebook.  Thirdly, this was posted on G+.

"They're cross-posting.  So what?"

They've probably got some widget they punch information into that sends it to G+, Twitter, Pinterest, and Facebook, alike.  It's nothing personal.  It's very impersonal, now that you mention it.  But no matter which network you're using, Facebook is still god-emperor.  Everyone's on it, so we'll host everything through it, post everything to it, share everything with it, and if you're not in this walled garden (oh, yes...I went there), it's you're own fault.

It goes without saying that this isn't just Whole Foods.  A couple friends of mine are still circling some level of higher-education, be they undergrad, masters, or crazy PhD.  One of them has a professor who expressed an interest in posting assignment details in a Facebook group he created for the class.  This friend is not on Facebook.

If this were 2005, when Facebook didn't require DNA samples for verification, this might not be such an issue.  It would have been silly, since the university has its own network for assignments and forum discussions, but now?  Mutual friends and I encouraged this friend to go talk to the Dean.  This professor is essentially forcing everyone to use Facebook; a corporation that requires more information than some (not enough) are comfortable handing over.

"So, what's your point?"

My point, if I must have one, is that I won't ask you to *like me on Facebook*, +1 me on G+, or follow me on Twitter.  I understand that many people are using Facebook for their online presence and influence, but this is not for me.  It means more if you're on my table, talking to your friends about my business, or actually interacting with me in these social mediums.  I also have this little blog to say, "Hey!  Look at me!"

Monday, October 21, 2013

Don't design your own...

Before planning our own business cards, my classmates and I were given a series of examples of what NOT to do.  Some cards seemed more intent on spiritual enlightenment than massage (which is fine, if that's your shtick), several were too disorganized to hold anyone's attention, and I remember one in particular that looked questionable.  It gave me a mental picture of a rusty old trailer at the edge of town and oil-stained linens, to say nothing about the appearance of the practitioner herself.

Business card templates can't help with shoddy-lookin selfies, but they can help with organization.  Your preferred word processor (mine is Pages) should come with a selection of templates from which to choose, and examples of how to fill in the desired information.  It's pretty simple.  And if you don't want to print your own, you can always head over to Vista Print.  AMTA members get a discount with this service.

As for websites...goodness, there are some bad ones out there.  Seeing as I use NeoCities to build my website, I'll recommend browsing through the websites they support.  Don't stop at "last updated".  Also consider the sites with the most hits.  There's no accounting for taste, but there must be a lesson worth learning somewhere in there.  "Leave it to the professionals", perhaps?  In that case...

There's a possibility that my website could show up in a WHAT NOT TO DO segment of a business class.  However, if this hypothetical class took the time to learn a bit about me, they might appreciate why it looks so elementary.  While I don't have the tools to host my own domain, I'm happy with 1&1 (yes, that's my referral link), and I'm immeasurably grateful for NeoCities and their Ground Floor for giving me the tools to learn how to build my own website.

Conclusion:  Work within your means.  I'm not interested in giving you a list of DOs and DON'Ts, but a WHY for what I'm doing might be of some assistance.


Looking for a domain registrar?
1&1
dnsimple
Domain Monster
Name
Namecheap
*List compiled by brief survey.  Do your homework before settling!

Monday, October 14, 2013

Employed or Independent?

The last step in establishing my business was contacting Santa Clara Weekly, sending them a copy of my "Fictitious Business Name Statement", and paying a fee for them to run an ad in the paper for 4 weeks.  On the outset, I found all of this very intimidating, but now that it's over, I'm not too daunted by the task of promoting myself.

As stated in a previous entry, I had no interest in running my own business.  Not for lack of ambition, but rather, lack of experience.  While I'm generally of a competitive nature, I couldn't see what I'd have to offer as an independent MT vs joining a team.  I enjoy having a team.  Weighing all the positives and negatives, I even loved having roommates!  Working independently held no appeal for me.

Then the job hunt began.

One of the reasons I decided to study massage therapy was because of the job market.  The roommates and I had given up cable, so I wasn't seeing any of the commercials that promised big money in the profession.  I just knew that it was something that I would enjoy, and I could support my oft-mentioned programmer husband during the perceivable starving-artist phase of his career.  After an extra year in formal education, thanks to a lovely overlap, I could support the both of us while he built his code and resumé and whatever else he needed to do.  I was going to work for a local hospital and single-handedly revamp their dwindling massage department!

Tell God your plans, sit back and listen for the giggles.

My husband was recognized for his talent and contacted by one of Silicon Valley's many start-ups.  Neither of us were finished with school when these interviews started, but it was pretty clear that we'd be moving.  My in-laws were a reasonable distance from Rasmussen, so I resided with them for a few months while I finished school.  They're pretty awesome, like that.

I took a few months off of life when I arrived in California.  After twenty years in the education machine, it felt warranted.  I searched job listings on-and-off until I found a clinic that seemed to best fit me.  I interviewed, I got the job, enjoyed it, worked there a month, and was laid off.  Remember that job market complaint?  I was assured that my work was stellar, but they couldn't afford to keep me.

I took a few more months off, during which time I obtained my certification from the California Massage Therapy Council.  Now I can work anywhere!  If I can find the right atmosphere.  I was set for an orientation with one company before I realized the chemistry wouldn't work.  My dad gave me plenty of grief for this because "it's a job!"  As MTs, we know how important it is to have the right chemistry between ourselves and clients, as well as with colleagues.  If I needed to be the primary bread-winner, I might have "sucked it up", but it was better, this way.

Knowing not what else to do, having been spun in circles by hospitals, having no direction whatsoever, I applied at Massage Envy.  I know people who've worked there for years, but I walked away after a month.  What a spotty resumé I was building.  At least this neat little used bookstore was hiring, and they liked me!

I think everyone needs to work retail, at some point.  I've always known to be kind to baristas and cashiers, but being on that side of the register opened my eyes.  After years of writing lofty essays for a "four year" university, my intelligence was insulted, time and again, because my math skills have waned.
"You mean you can't do it in your head?"
"Where would we be without computers?"
So much for that lofty BA.  But here's a word to the courteous:  Don't shove more coinage at your cashier as they're handing your change back to you.  When we ask, "Out of $5?" we're confirming that you don't want to pay with anything else.

Aside from learning to deal with cranky people under pressure, I've also learned a lot from my boss and manager about owning an independent, small business.  I'm still very young in the business world, and I'm doing my best to learn as much as quickly as possible.  I don't feel so overwhelmed now as I did in the beginning, despite seeing no end to this growing mound of work, but I feel an equal to the task.  With resources such as Massage Book, Massamio, and Massage Therapy World at my disposal, I'm feeling a little more equal to the task.